The First Step to Overcoming Any Challenge
What Grit Really Means — and How to Practice It When Things Get Hard
We seldom fear the known. It’s the unknown that unsettles us.
Not the confirmed diagnosis, but the waiting.
Not the result, the “what if.”
Not the outcome, the uncertainty.
“What if it’s worse than I think?”
“How will I handle it?”
“Where will this lead?”
That’s where most of our anxiety lives. In the space between imagination and reality.
It’s in this in-between state that we are most likely to hesitate. We research. We rationalize. We wait. We try to convince ourselves we’re being prudent.
But in reality, we’re avoiding the first step to actually “pushing through” that challenge or setback.
A Pop in the Shower
A few weeks ago, I was standing in the shower when I suddenly heard (and felt) a pop in my left thigh.
It wasn’t dramatic. There was no fall. No sharp pain.
Just a unmistakable shift in how my left hip felt.
Thirteen months earlier, I had undergone a hip replacement in that same hip. It was the second replacement I had done in 2024, starting on the right hip. Hip replacements are often routine, but it is more complex and done earlier in life for many patients like myself with dwarfism. With this complexity in mind, I sought out a surgeon in New York City to do them.
While the right hip replacement was a smooth replacement, the surgeon and his team noticed compromised bone in the left hip and placed additional hardware and a bone graft to reinforce the femur. So when I felt the pop, my mind immediately tried to normalize it.
“It’s probably just a muscle sliding awkwardly around the support bands.”
There wasn’t much pain at first. Only instability. I hobbled out of the shower and into my office, convincing myself it would settle with rest. We were snowed in anyway. I wasn’t going anywhere.
But over the next week, the instability worsened. The pain increased. Eventually, I found myself back on crutches, something I hadn’t needed since being cleared twelve weeks after surgery.
That alone was humbling.
After a week of self-reassurance, I finally contacted my surgeon to order an x-ray. Not because I believed something was seriously wrong. But because I needed to rule it out.
That, I’ve come to realize, is what showing up often looks like.
Not panic. Not drama. Just the willingness to face the possibility.
The Phone Call
The x-rays were sent to my medical team in New York City. I waited.
Mid-afternoon, my phone rang. It was the physician assistant who had worked closely with me through both hip replacements. She had seen me in clinic, managed my surgical incisions, walked me through recovery.
She asked how I was feeling.
“As long as I stay off my feet, I’m okay,” I told her.
Then she asked, “Did you fall?”
Her tone had shifted.
That’s when I knew.
She told me I had fractured my femur — in the same area as the implant. Not only that, I needed to be seen immediately. Tomorrow, if possible.
Within an hour, flights and a hotel were secured from Nashville to New York City. Then came the sentence that carries weight in moments like this:
“Don’t buy a return ticket yet.”
If the implant had shifted, surgery might be necessary. Quickly.
And just like that, the unknown was no longer theoretical.
The Choice
In moments like these, there is always a decision point.
You can panic.
You can cope through distraction.
Or you can face it.
Panic would have been understandable. Coping would have looked like minimizing it, making jokes, or trying to stay busy enough not to think about it.
Facing it meant booking the flight, showing up to the appointment, looking at the scan, and hearing the verdict — whatever it might be.
It meant choosing clarity over imagination.
That is what I mean when I talk about grit.
Not emotional suppression.
Not stoicism for appearance’s sake.
But directional courage. The willingness to move toward what is uncertain.
24 Hours Later
Twenty-four hours later, I found myself sitting in LaGuardia’s Terminal B awaiting my return flight home.
CT scans and a full evaluation had revealed that the implant was stable. No emergency surgery was required. I simply needed time for the fracture to heal.
The outcome wasn’t ideal. I would be off my leg for weeks and closely monitored. While there were plenty conversations with my medical team to be had, an emergency surgery was not needed.
What Showing Up Actually Means
When I say the first step to overcoming challenges is to show up, I don’t mean charging forward recklessly.
I mean this:
You name the thing.
You move toward it.
You take the next responsible step.
You make the appointment.
You have the hard conversation.
You open the financial statement.
You step on the scale.
You ask the question you’ve been avoiding.
You don’t solve the entire mountain. You take the next visible step toward clarity.
Clarity, even when difficult, is lighter than dread.
What Grit Is (and Isn’t)
For a long time, I thought grit meant enduring quietly. Don’t complain. Don’t slow down. Don’t need help.
I’ve since learned that isn’t grit. It’s isolation.
Grit is purposeful engagement with what is hard.
It is not blind endurance.
It is not grinding yourself into exhaustion.
It is not pretending that pain doesn’t exist.
Grit is the decision to face uncertainty with honesty.
It is showing up to yourself when avoidance would be easier.
Showing up to your family when checking out would be simpler.
Showing up to your calling when doubt grows louder.
Grit is not about being unbreakable.
It’s about being willing to face what could break you — and stepping toward it anyway.
The Ripple Effect
When you show up to your challenges, other people are watching.
Your children are not studying whether you win. They are watching whether you face it.
Your spouse does not need perfection. She needs presence.
Your friends do not need a hero. They need an example.
Resiliency is contagious. But so is avoidance.
The First Step
If something in your life feels heavy or unclear right now, the invitation is simple:
Name it.
Share it with someone you trust.
Take one visible step within the next 48 hours.
Not the full solution. Just the next step.
The first step is always the same.
Show up.
Not perfectly.
Just honestly.
That is where overcoming begins.